Family Roles

Put on, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if one has a grievance against another; as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do.
And over all these put on love, that is, the bond of perfection.

Colossians 3:12-14

On the Sunday following Christmas, the Church celebrates the Feast of the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. We are invited to meditate upon the virtues each member exemplifies and to ask Mary and Joseph to intercede for us to their Son who will bring before the Father all our petitions. What the Holy Family teaches us is exactly what St. Paul tells us in his letter to the Colossians: “heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience” as well as forgiveness and love. When we do our best to live out these virtues we are slowly and surely living out our universal call to holiness.

Each member of the family plays a specific role — the father protects, the mother nurtures, and the child grows in wisdom and obedience. Of course there are also other roles, e.g. both parents govern and teach their children. But there is a common role that all members share, and that is each member is called to help one another grow in holiness, that is, to help one another get to heaven! This call is really an act of love. To love someone means to want and will their good, and what, if not heaven and eternal life with God, is the ultimate good?

For Christians, our end “goal” should be heaven and communion with God, but how often do we really think about it, let alone be intentional with everything we do with that end in mind? Do we know the role we play in the Kingdom? Our role in God’s plan of salvation? Yes, Jesus has won for us salvation, so we do not and can not “earn” it, but we must live in a manner that is consistent with that desire for salvation. If our mentality is Well, Jesus died on the Cross for me, and as long as I go to Church and try my best to live a good, Christian life, then I have nothing to worry about, then we may have some work to do. Yes, Jesus did die for us and He did win for us salvation, but what we do here on earth matters and affects where we end up when our time here comes to a close. I have always thought that the aforementioned mentality was perfectly fine and will get me into heaven, but over the years that has grown and developed, specifically the “try my best” part. How do we define “try” and “best”?

When we say we try to live a life of holiness, do we mean we pray, go to Mass weekly, make holy hours, fast, keep the commandments, and give of our time, talent, and treasure to charity or does it mean praying once in a while, going to Mass when possible, and following the Commandments I see fit, and helping those in need begrudgingly? And, when we say “our best” does that mean “at out convenience” or does it mean “my number one priority”? If God is not at the heart of all that we do, and if heaven is not our number one priority then we do not really want it that badly for either ourselves or those we love.

Brothers and sisters, we are all part of a natural family but also a part of the family of God, and our individual roles in it matter. We all play an important role in the Body of Christ and this role is guided by our living out our call to holiness. And what does this call to holiness look like? Scroll up to the top of this reflection and the two verses from St. Paul’s letter to the Colossians paint us a perfect picture of it.

Blessed Holy Family Sunday.

Watch my reflection for Holy Family Sunday below.

Bottomless Love

“The LORD keeps faith forever,
    secures justice for the oppressed,
    gives food to the hungry.
The LORD sets captives free.”

Psalm 146:7

Companies and restaurants often offer and promote “bottomless” products or services to draw customers. Bottomless brunch, unlimited breadsticks, all you can eat buffet, etc. Some may ask how do these restaurants not go bankrupt with these offers? In fact, I read in an article some time ago that one chain restaurant filed for bankruptcy because of this! They thought that the promotion would draw more customers with the hopes that they will order other items on the menu or invite others to come or come back more often, but their cost-benefit analysis seemed to have failed them. So in the end, their bottomless promotion did reach a bottom and it ran dry. We see a similar concern in the Old Testament when the Prophet Elijah visited the widow in Zarephath. The widow’s supply oil and flour were running dry and going empty; yet, Elijah asked for food.

If someone who is not a Christian reads this passage, they would think that Elijah is a selfish man who is abusing his authority to get food from a poor widow whom he knows is hurting. However, those with faith, know that God must be doing something greater in the background. To the faithless and ignorant eye, the widow’s supply of oil and flour is indeed dwindling and she and her son will soo starve to death, but to those with faith, we know that God’s Providence will come through. And it does. The seemingly empty jug of oil and jar of flour continued to feed the widow and her son until the day rain fell upon the land, just as the Lord promised. God’s word prevailed and Elijah’s encounter with the widow strengthened her, body and soul. The Lord stays true to His word.

In the Gospel we read about another widow who is struggling; however, even with the little that she has, she places her offering into the temple treasury. Jesus tells His disciples that this widow with her few coins gave more than any of the others because she gave from what little she had and not her surplus. It is not how much one gives that is important, but it is how one gives. As Christians we practice tithing or some form of gift giving. Traditionally, we are asked to give 10% of our income to the Church, in whatever form that may look like. However, in today’s world 10% can be a lot, especially for those who struggle to feed their families. So, does the Lord hold this against them? Of course not. The Lord does not need our offerings. We give because it ought to be the natural desire of our hearts — to give back to God for the many great things He has given to us. The rich gave from their seemingly bottomless surplus, but the widow gave from her all that she had, trusting that no matter how little she had, she ought to give to God because God has blessed her and will continue to. This is not to say that parents should use the money set aside for food for their families to instead put it in the collection basket. God never asks this of them. God will never ask parents to starve themselves or their children. The greatest commandment is to love God and the second is to love our neighbors as ourselves. In loving their children and feeding them and giving to them what they need is and expression of loving God.

Unlike the empty promises of bottomless benefits of this world, God’s love and mercy is truly bottomless. Just as the jug of oil and jar of flour continued to provide for the widow in Zarephath, so too will God’s love and mercy continue to envelop us. When we are able to experience and receive this bottomless, boundless, and unconditional love and mercy and see how much God has blessed us, our natural response will be like that of the widow in the Gospel — to give to God and neighbor what little we have because God has loved us so much and we know that what little we give, God will in turn multiply and make overflow.

Knowing Christ, Knowing Us

“And he asked them,
‘But who do you say that I am?’

Peter said to him in reply,
‘You are the Christ.’”

Mark 8:29

Have you ever had that experience after talking with someone or having gotten to know someone for sometime, you learn something about yourself or saw something in yourself you could not or did not see before? That is the beauty of relationships. They are avenues that allow us to know others but also to know ourselves more deeply. We think we know ourselves until we encounter someone who challenges our way of thinking or mode of living. At those decisive moments we come to see ourselves in a more objective light, we come to see the truth about ourselves.

When Jesus asked what others said about Him, the disciples reported people thought He was Elijah or a prophet. Then Jesus asked them who they say that He is. Peter is the voice that we hear — “You are the Christ.” Peter speaks up first and he speaks on behalf of the others. Although this “primacy” of Peter is not explicitly described in Mark’s account, we see it clearly in Matthew’s. Peter spent three years with the Lord, day in and day out. He walked with Him, ate with Him, worshipped with Him, learned from Him, listened to Him, and spoke with Him. So, Peter had come to a deeper understanding and a more intimate knowledge of who Jesus was — not only was Jesus Peter’s Teacher, He was also His friend and brother. But Peter still did not fully understand Jesus.

After Peter confesses that Jesus is the Christ, Jesus speaks of His impending passion. Peter did not like it and he made it known. Peter took Him aside and began to rebuke Him. Rebuke Him? What was Peter thinking? Peter was probably grieved at the fact that Jesus would undergo such humiliation and rejection. But as Jesus reminded him, he was thinking as humans think and not as God thinks. Peter has yet to understand that life knowing Jesus transcends the mundane. Peter did not yet understand that what was most important is the will of God and that preservation of one’s personal life was not. Yes, of course it is necessary to want to live and keep ourselves alive, but it must be put in the proper context and order. Hence, Jesus then told them the conditions of discipleship — you must deny yourself, carry your cross, and follow Him. Through this encounter, Peter came to understand so much not only about Jesus but also himself. He thought he understood Jesus, but he had only scratched the surface. He thought he knew himself, but came to see himself through the lens of humility and saw that he still had a lot he did not know about the life of a follower of Christ and his own commitment to that life. In coming to know Christ, Peter came to know himself.

Do we know Jesus? Or are we content with simply knowing about Him and following Him at a distance, only when it is convenient or beneficial? Do we really know ourselves or have we simply been living as the person we want others to see? If we come to know who Jesus is, we will slowly come to know who we are ourselves because it is in His image and likeness that we were created. Who else would know us better than the One who created us? Let us spend some time with Him today asking Him, “Who are You, Lord? Who am I?” and “Who are you calling me to be?”

Watch this week’s reflection below.